He said "i love you " and i said "okay"

I know it seems cruel and cold and heartless of me but he said " i love you " and i said "okay"


I mean honestly its not wrong of me to say okay , i am after all okay with the fact that he loves me. The issue is that he got mad at me because all i said was okay with a straight face. Why would a person force it from you, they cant so they must understand that we process love at a different pace. There was no way that i would say it just because he had said it.


I still have to think if i love him, do i love him? should i love him? love just comes right or do you decide on it? when do you know?


Actually i love very few people, its just a reserved emotion. But it worries me that I can say "im inlove" to a beautiful pair of shoes but not to someone who's there and cares and shows emotion.It is my prerogative right?

 I know some where in my mind i'm like "oh please please give me a break , these men and their "love" and honestly. He's a beautiful liar though but really i'm keeping my cards to my chest and my wits about me".

If this is a chess set i want to know which piece am i , am i the queen the one he shields and protects or am i the pawn dispensable at any moment or maybe not so low in the food chain but still i'm not what the game is about. I'm good if i'm there but either way i can go. It really hurts to get the full picture and realise "OUCH !" but i'd rather enter the game knowing where all the pieces lie.

So he made his move and said "i love you" it doesn't make him my king because i'm still setting up the pieces of who is who in my life. I know that no one understands my logic better then a man -so he'll forgive me because all its going to be is okay from me.

By Lindi Khumalo